Planned Parenthood protestors provoke perverse ponderings

I have been volunteering as an escort at Planned Parenthood in my midwestern town. My job is to stand in the parking lot and walk over to cars as they drive in, walk up to the windows, and warn the people in the cars that there are protestors and that they shouldn't listen to what they are shouting. Then I try to talk over the protestors' shouts as I walk the people into the building--I inquire where they are coming from, whether they are going to have lunch in town, tell them I really like their hair, etc.

There are two groups of protestors: the ones who just stand there silently and pray, and the ones who shout and carry signs. Here's a sampling of their comments.

To the women:
"Don't kill your son or daughter! You'll just be the parent of a dead child!"
"We can offer you real help! We have someone who will adopt your baby!"
"They are profiting off the blood of innocents!" (This one makes me lol, because fundies think PP is some moneymaking scam.)

To the men:
"It's your job to protect her! Be a man and stand up for your child!" (Problematic in so many patriarchal ways.)

To me and my colleagues:
"I hope you can't sleep when you lie down on your pillow tonight because of all the innocent children you've led to their deaths!"
"You're no different than Hitler!" (Of course they have to follow Godwin's rule. They are basically the original trolls.)

PP's official policy is to not engage them, so I restrain myself while I'm wearing my official vest. But gosh, I really wish I could talk to them. It's fun to give fundies a taste of their own medicine and respond to them in ways that throw them off their game.

Here's some of the things I would say.

"Hi, how are you this morning?" *offers to shake hands "I'm Apodosis. What's your name? Good to see you again today. It's nice to have an opportunity to help others, and I wouldn't have that without you."

"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Don't you think there are better ways you could show Christ's love than yelling at people? Why don't you go feed the homeless or something?"

(To the woman with the 'I regret my abortion' sign) "Would you like to tell me about it? How long ago? Under what circumstances? It seems like you are still carrying around a lot of baggage from that. Have you seen a therapist?"

"What church do y'all go to? I go to the UCC church on the east side of town. Do you guys have a mailing list or something? How do you always arrange to be here? Do you carpool?"

*raising my hands in prayer "Lord, bless us all here today. Grant us the wisdom to understand the reasons behind other people's choices, even if we do not agree. Grant us the faith to trust women's ability to make the most ethical decision available in a set of bad options. Grant that we may abandon our attempts to control others' bodies and instead turn our wills towards freeing ourselves from the blindness of our privilege. Grant us the compassion to pity all your children, not just the ones who die before they are born. In Your name, Amen."